A Metrosexuals Bathroom Wall

2004-09-01T02:43:00.000-07:00

Nemo mortalium omnibus horis sapit

No mortal is wise at all hours

Rethink the unthinkable

2004-08-08T03:43:00.000-07:00

Have you ever been having one of the most enjoyable dreams, you know the one of the ones with the vivid visuals, excellent ambiance and a totally amazing plot and then...

All of a sudden you *magically* wake up?

Well you think to you self dammit I was enjoying that and then you think well maybe I can get back that very same dream if I just quickly go back to sleep.

Let me tell you it rarely works.

Which brings me to the point of this post...

In the words of Fredrich Nietzsche,

"What one ought to Shun is found Attractive"

I have this to be very true. Consider that statement one more time and you will find that it is actually the truth about almost everything in the world. I will not go into all the things that you should shun but you find attractive because I might miss one in my haste and...then I would have all of you permnantly attached to my ass.

It is safe to say that this is one of the truths of the world.

Philosophy has, once again, began to immerse itself in my brain. Through the readings of Nietzsche and Plato, Peck and C.S. Lewis to name a few. I am trying to convince some of Machiavelli 's works to find themselves a place on my bookshelf; however, they have been reluctant to leave the e-shelves of Amazon.com without a transfer of monetary funds to the above mentioned money grabbing corporation. I am also interested in reading The Art of War, purely for the reason that it is quoted so much. I want to know what all the fuss is about.

I have a feeling that I am going to get back into artistic nudes as well. I have a small book of them (Nudes: Indexxi by Lidia Carbonelle) I picked up amazon but I would like to expand my collection- some framed wall art and a collection by this Austrian artist would, really, be awesome. I am especially attracted (maybe the wrong word to use here) to black and white artistic nudes; however partial color saturation is amazing. Some of the pictures are absolutely beautiful, in an extremely non-sexual manner.

.film
So I will finally update everyone, who reads my small contribution to world, about my plans as a filmmaker.

First off- I will probably and *hopefully* not return to CR. I will work for about 6-8 months and then I will depart for the wild blue yonder of film school.

The three schools I am considering are:

#1 Academy of Arts University (in San Francisco)
#2 Brooks Institute of Photography (in Santa Barbara & Venture)
#3 Vancouver Film School (in Canada)

Note: I think it would be really cool to go to NYU; however, I really don't want to live in New York City.

They are in that order for one reason and one reason only to help me choose one. I am really considering at Academy of Arts University.

- -

Lets end this where we started....

"Rethink the Unthinkable"

-The Metrosexual

Me Thinkith You Drinkith!

2004-07-08T01:47:00.000-07:00

PlanetOut Entertaining: AQUARIUS

Drinking style
Aquarius and drinking don't go together that well (except for water, that is). They have an innate tendency toward know-it-allism, and if they get an idea while sizzled, they're more stubborn than a stain or a stone. If they're throwing a party or organizing an outing, however, they're too preoccupied with their duties to get combative -- and they make perfectly charming drunks in that case. Fortunately, they're usually capital drink-nursers. They also make the best designated drivers (if you can get them before they start raising their wrist): Aquarius is fascinated by drunk people and capable of holding interesting conversations with soused strangers while sober.

Trademark cocktails
Aquarius is likely to order stuff most people have never heard of: a capirinha, Satan's whiskers, a negroni, an Arthur Tompkins. They like to stump the bartender. This sign rules the color electric blue and would be pleased by any tipple featuring blue curacao. They also rule the olive tree, so pour the juice into that dirty martini.

Drinking buddies
Jennifer Aniston, Ellen DeGeneres, Dr. Dre, Matt Groening, Ashton Kutcher, Ronald Reagan, Christina Ricci, Justin Timberlake, Oprah Winfrey, Elijah Wood"

Check out Alcohoroscopes for more amazingly true astrologically fluff.

What prompted this you ask? I met some new "friends." They were quite entertaining. One of them- a brown haired little chica, the most amazing eyes you have ever seen and a mouth to die for, I have taken a small fancy to. On the plus side she kept offering me glasses of wine, very enjoyable.

But seriously lets not get ahead of ourselves like some other people I know. Drivebys anyone?

Have you seen the woman dance,
have you seen the shine,
the shine of Lust,
the shine on the skin of the man.

The air,
the smoke,
envelopes the faces,
drawing them ever nearer,
which one hath you know,
forever between you,
which one can see your soul.

You think of god,
as a man in the sky,
a man of omniscient prowess.
The true sense of god,
is a woman of sulter,
pulling gently on the strings of your life.

Which one shall you choose,
the god that is yours,
which one do you know,
which one is just real.

I say choose the one,
from beyond the setting sun,
the one who takes your life.

-Erin The Metrosexual

Raise Shields on My Mark. Mark!

2004-07-02T05:37:00.000-07:00

I have become increasingly interested in my security on the internet. I have always had a firewall on my computer, even when I had a mac. I now however have branched out in PeerGuardian and other such programs; one of which is ProtoWall. I am also going to to try a Proxy style program by the name of JAP. Once I have tested it and found it to my liking I will update this post.

I am off to the Grandparents so for the 4th of July weekend. I will talk to you all in the very near future; be looking for a blog post on the laws of love.

Until next time...

Remember to watch your kaboose.

Dooba?

The Metrosexual Presents: The How to Be Fashionable Series....

2004-06-26T01:57:00.000-07:00

Welcome this is your host James Lipton-

And Now from the Austin Texas Astrodome your host The Metro-s-e-x-u-a-l,

Thank you, thank you James.

Well today we are talking mainly about the proper attire one must wear when exiting the house everyday. Now I don't care what you wear when your behind the closed doors of your home but when you come out please be dressed in a way that does not make you look and, this is to all you Jordache wearing non-showering schelps, smell like a bum.

STEP 1: Get a Fashion Sense

Okay now I know that some of you good not create a workable outfit out of a a couple of Gucci shopping bags so this is for you. You need to hang around with some people who have money or at least know how to shop the sales at Bergdorfs. I mean come on get some friends who dress well. You know the one in your group who always gets the looks from people (no not the fat guy he doesn't have any idea even how to exercise how could he possible dress well?).

If you are having a problem with Step 1 just goto to the Kwiki Mart and grab yourself the newest GQ (gentleman's Quarterly) that will have all you need it might be a little advanced for you at this stage so you may want to start with FHM or Maxim both which have style sections.

But for the love of god STAY AWAY from the Sears Catalogue and anything that resembles a K-Mart Flyer.

By now you should have a basic understanding of what you should model yourself after. Now it is time for...

STEP 2: Get a Credit Card

Everyone must have a credit card (hopefully Platinum) with a very high credit limit because if you don't you will be able to afford about 2 items, probably underwear, ad unless you are me you will not be able to cut it with just underwear. Well Johnnie Depp could cut it too. Many companies give credit to poor people like yourself so just point you browser to Google.com and search "O% APR Credit Cards." If you are lucky you just might get one. Alternately you can just head over to Macy*s and they will ask you if you want to sign up for a Macy*s card; you definitely want one sounds flirt with the chick behind the counter and get her to sign you up for a gold card. You will thank me later.

STEP 3: Buy The Basics

The key to actually owning a full wardrobe you can wear outside of your parents basement is starting with basics.

Let me outline it for you...

You will need more than:

7 Dress Shirts (in Various Colors. No all white shirts here son)

5 pairs of unmatched dress pants (in Various Colors. Unmatched means that they don't
go with a suit jacket)

10 Neck-Ties (They must be silk.)

15 pairs of socks (divide them up equally between dress and sport socks)

5 Button down short sleeve shirts (these are for casual attire and all you are looking for is something to impress the ladies, or the guys if you happen to be Gay, when you are not sporting more formal wear.

10 Pairs of Undergarments (Now I shouldn't have to outline this for you if you already undergarments on a semi-regular basis I think you are lost. Just make sure that they are comfortable and that you can move around in them.

with these few basics you should be able to get through the first initial plunge into being viewed by people who do not call you by a pet name. Lets move on to harder things.

STEP 4: How Much is That Suit in The Window

You need to own at least ONE full suit, come on your a man right? This suit should be Dark Blue or blue or black. Absolutely NO pulling a Dumb and Dumber and getting anything in pink or light blue.

Let me instruct you that pinstripe is the way to go when it comes to wanting to woo someone (i.e. get that job, win the girl, or get that house loan). People will respect you more in a Pinstripe suit.

On to material for a suit. There are only three accepted fabrics: Wool, Cotton and Silk. If you get a polyester suit and I find out about it I will hunt you down and kill you, unless of course if it is by Donna Karen or Gorgeio Armani, then it is acceptable; however, once again K-Mart or Target doesn't count.

STEP 5: Look at My New Kicks

So kicks is slang for Shoes, yes. You MUST own a wide array of shoes not just a couple of pairs of sneakers and pair of "dress" shoes. The key to shoes is have mainly shoes that match your lifestyle. If you run a lot have some running shoes but also remember that you are not always go to be running. So you will need some casual and more dressy shoes for the times when you want to look sharp (not just when you go to a job interview or go to work). You should Look sharp all the time.

Blacks and Browns are good colors to stick to in dress and casual dress shoes. Anything else will get you weird stares from everyone, especially women- one of the first things they notice is your shoes. Don't trust that whole only personality matters to me crap, it is the shoes that determine your worthiness- for most things.

When it comes to athletic shoes you can be a little bit more out there. With lots of colors to choose from Blues, Whites and Reds are good colors. However black can be quite versatile as well. If you are really interested in getting out side the fashion box and creating your own you can go with multi colored kicks in bright colors such as orange and pink. Just stay away form yellow.

With the shoes to match the suit and to match your Basics you are now ready to start coordinating.

STEP 6: Wear It Well

You now have to learn about color matching. Most things can be matched together accept maybe orange and white. Or any kind of bright Yellow.

The main thing to remember is that your Shoes MUST match your belt. Also you should have a main color and match to that. For example you would wear black pants, a blue shirt, black shoes and a black belt. There will be no brown shoe wearing with black pants on my watch.

Furthermore use common sense if you don't think that red shirt will match the rest of your outfit don't wear it. Another good thing to remember is that blues, silvers, grays and black are your friend; they go with almost everything.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-

This is the First Part of an ongoing Series. You will see the next installment in the near future. I will also be developing one for all the female readers of this blog.

May I buy you a Mound, I mean Island?

2004-06-22T18:30:00.000-07:00

I gots da bread bitches.

I am now releasing a press release to the people of the world. I, Erin- The Metrosexual, have just received TWO brand spanking new Platinum Credit Cards, I love Platinum cards. I now have quite a nice collection of Platinum Cards.

"My, What high credit limits you have," "Better to buy expensive suits with, bitches."
The Metrosexual's Little shopping spree in the hood

.music
Holy shit, I once again heard Beyonce Knowles - Sexy and damn is that song sexy. I tried downloading up from KazaaLite with no luck, all the copies were fucked up.

.attraction
I am incredible attracted, at this very moment, to The Kawasaki Ninja ZX6RR. A very quick streetbike. With just over 600cc the ZX6RR, the racing model, is amazing at just over 350 lbs.

(click to make large)

(click to make large)

.film
I have just seen Torque and BikerBoyz. Both films are fucking awesome. I have recently switched my thoughts to purchasing and riding a streetbike. We aren't talkin' about your uncles hog here. Anyway, the films were sweet lots of tricks and the such with quite a bit of plot to boot. I was surprised at that fact. I also saw someother fims but I will share those with you, my readers, at a later time.

I regret to say, I have so much to do that I really must go.

Until next time...

Brought to you by: Erin and The Council to Ban Stupidity. Would you like to Join?

Ja, Little Girllie Man. I Vill Crush You, Ja.

2004-06-12T03:36:00.000-07:00

I have finally found the workout that will make me very, very, very- large. It is the "vehicle pull" or "the push" in my case.

The story is: I went out driving, for pleasure, earlier this evening and suddenly, I got the great idea to push my car. I don't know why I thought that it would be interesting, but it was. Well, I found that it was quite enjoyable, yet strenuous enough to cause fatigue and thus build muscle. I would Like to work my way up to heavier vehicles. Currently my stats are:

Pushing: 1998 Ford Zx2
weight: aprox. 2500 LBS. (of car)
Speed: aprox. 5mph
duration: 1/8 mile

I am going to be increasing these factors: duration of the pull and hopefully, If I can find a heavier car/truck I will be able to increase the weight of the pull.

All the way around it was an extremely enjoyable experience. I am now going to do it everyday. My first goal is to increase the duration of the push maybe 1/2 mile. I am also going to try to work my way up to a 18 Wheel Truck.

However, if you really want a workout try dead lifting a car.

(click to make large)

.music
I haven't really been listening to a lot of music lately; however just five minutes I started again; what can I say I am fickle. I am currently as I type this blog listenign to Dj Bubbles "Bidibodi Bidibu" (song from Super Troopers porsche scenes). I am also in the process of downloading "You Give Love a Bad Name" by Bon Jovi. The download will be done in 2:36.

.employment
Well I have finally been getting some serious tech calls from my employer Alpha Sum Business Machines. I independently service over 70 locations in a 100-mile radius of my immediate location. Fun stuff. I have had this job since March; however, the work is finally picking up. I finally thought I would mention it.

NEWS BREAK: I am at this exact moment listening to Bon Jovi's "You Give Love a Bad Name". Shot through the heart, baby.
.attraction
My current attraction is the body, my body to be exact. I am kicking as at HealthSport and I am taking names. It is awesome yesterday, the last time I went to the gym, I ran for five minutes on a really fucking fast setting on the treadmill after wards I felt a huge urge to puke or rather that I was going to puke so I better find a receptacle to extricate it in to.

The bathroom was my friend. After that interesting experience, that was my second time vomiting due to a workout, I proceeded to have one of the most effective and strengthen workout I had ever had. It was fucking awesome, as Jeager would say it was ROXOR.

.film
On the subject of film, I had one of the best nights of Old-Movie-Night- ever. It was excellent. I finally met Richard’s son Ashley and another one of their friends Shannon (I think I spelled that right). Anyway, we kicked the day off with Paul, acquaintance of mine, and I heading off to HealthSport to workout.

Paul doesn’t have a membership so it was more of a day for Paul to workout and me to act as a trainer. It was an interesting experience, Paul started out by turning the treadmill to the one of the higher speed settings and then trying to take his sweat shirt off while running rather quickly, needless to say Paul lost his footing and went tumbling down causing a large crashing noise and the snapping sound of peoples necks as the turned their heads to view what had just occurred.

The mayhem continues though; as Paul was attempting to get himself back on to the speeding treadmill he was gripping the bars and was trying to get on, unfortunately the treadmill was not making it easy. Paul lost his footing- again and as I turned to view his progress I was greeted with the sight of Paul bouncing up and down and flailing around his knees bouncing around on the belt of the treadmill. The end of the story is he finally got back on to the treadmill and we completed the warm-up run.

The twist is a few minutes we were in the free weight area and I glanced down at his knees and what should I see but large amounts of blood and some nasty looking rubber belt burns. It was quite gruesome. Paul was incredibly manly throughout the entire experience- not a single peep out of him “that it hurt” anytime during the evening.

The rest of the workout was uneventful.

Fast-forward…

We headed of to Costco and bought some excellent bread, watermelon, twenty pounds of oranges and some funky fake sushi stuff. We decided that we would surprise Richard (Japanese teacher at the college I attend) with this “sushi” and see how rated it. The story behind this is that I once went to the Ritz, a local Japanese restaurant, with Richard so that we could rate the sushi. I thought it was excellent he thought it was sub-par. I believe that Darrel enjoy as well.
Anyway, it was hysterical; we got to Richards house with the foodstuffs and had him try the sushi. I was surprised he said it tasted all right. Even Paul liked it.

After the sushi we heard that Breanne (I think I spelled this right, too) and some guy who I don’t remember had moved out of the house that Richards owns behind his own house. So I totally wanted to see it.

Let me tell you it was a sweet place. It has this sunken room and then this loft like place that has these funny little steps leading up to it. The coolest part about the little room is that the door that leads to it is so skinny that it looks like a closet. I immediately got the great idea to craft some sort of shelving that looked like the back of a closet and rig it up so that I could use the little loft as a secret room. Kénes (pronounced ketnis) said that I it would be a perfect place for a speakeasy. That was the name for illegal bars during the prohibition (on liquor). I thought that was a great idea.

Fast-forward…

We then started the movie watching pandemonium. We watched a movie I can’t remember the title of and Shane, a western. All in all it was a great experience.

NEWS BREAK: I have heard through the grapevine that another instance of “Old-Movie-Night” occurred on Thursday; however, I declined to attend for certain reasons.

I am now at a loss for words. So, I Will bid you adieu and goodbye.

Brought to you by: Erin and the Future Dictators and Monarchs of America Association. I am a proud member.

Lets Be Car Ramrod

2004-05-29T21:52:00.000-07:00

Howdy, Howdy...Fucking Partners.

I am not actually back in the blogging spiriting I was just telling you that to get you off my fucking back a few weeks ago.

Well, My finals are over and I have seen my grades yet, but I hope they are whatI am expecting. On the subject of school I am now rethinking my Ink. I am trying to decide whether to stay in California and move down to the bay area or to move up to Vancouver, Canada and go to VFS (Vancouver Film School.) I mean I like California and all but I really think that Canada will have a lot more to offer me.

.fetish
My current fetish is brown haired women. I don't know why but brunettes have really began to interest me. I am thinking especially about European women; I don't exactly know why. It is just happening. Another thing that Canada has to offer, Europe away from Europe.

.humboldt
Ha...Ha. It is official, I FUCKING HATE THIS PLACE. My got it is hideous; It is heinous; It is a huge excuse for a county. I am tired of the surrounds and most of all of the people. All of the people in this place sicken me, down to the last one. What I have found that is even worse is the people that I know are not any better. I get rid of one set of fucking asshole-jackass-motherfuckers and what happens, it turns out that the other people who I know are just as fucking stupid. If you haven't got it yet I am talking about people who I used to consider my friends.

They are spineless, weakass, little bitches. You expect them to do one thing, because they are indeed your friends, but nooooo they have to the exact fucking opposite and be stupid about it all the fucking way. I truly can't stand their shit anymore. Good riddance to you all.

I hope you enjoy the stuff that I found, that a message for a certain person and to all you others get a fucking life and think for your fucking self for one minute.

Also, would you please stop being so fucking scared of your own fucking shadows.

Okay, well yah, so you, my readers, have seen that I am just a slight bit pissed off, huh?

I am just so fucking tired of the crap that other people believe is so fucking important and how I am always so wrong.

.questions
I was recently posed this question, "Erin, why do you have the mats in your car turned upside down?" I answered as any person who has messy friends who don't wipe their feet before the enter your car, "to keep the mud and dirt off my premium mats, of course." Well, this didn't seem to make any sense to the little logos (logic for all you ignorant people out there) questioner and he began to argue with me that I was "wasting the mats" and "that that's what the mats were for to get dirty."

Okay, NO, fucking expensive mats, just like my car, are supposed to be kept free of dirt and fucking mud. It is not my fault that you have a shitty car and that you always keep it so fucking dirty and for some reason, why- I don't exactly know, you don't seem to want to get a better one, maybe something that is not a shitty, rusty, 1994 escort (I may have the year wrong on that one.)

I don't know it just seems that people don't understand me. I used to just be the guy who had nice clothes and nice cars and you know nice stuff. Now, it seems that I am "Erin the one who is the capitalist, he always has all this stuff and he wants to have billions of dollars and make movies and We ALL think that he is fucking dumb for wanting those things."

It is funny though my friends seem to be content living with their parents for the rest of their lives or want to do radiology for a living, or god forbid, want to be fucking musicians or some have even said to me that don't what they want to do as long as they are content in their lives. Shit who wants to be just "content" and what the fuck is content: A white picket fence in front of your 4 bedroom house with your three whinny children and your fucking bitchy wife pulling down 56k working as a manager of some institution?

NO THANKS!

.blog
I am shaking my head now as I write this that now the only things that seem to move me to write a blog posts a things that people do to piss me off. Gone are the days of sexy, sultry and lusty musings of Erin the Metrosexual. Now all there is shitty interactions with people and fucking ignorant acquaintances. Yes, everyone I know has been demoted to aquaitances. It is an across the board thing so don't feel bad Billy Bob (I don't actually know anyone named Billy Bob.)

I am quite tired now and I cannot take either the blue pill or the red pill to make be keep blogging so I will continue with this line of acquaintance barredment in

"Lets Be Car Ramrod II"

coming to an RSS reader near you.

In the next issue of "Erin Tells the World to Fuckoff"
-Porn
-Why I am Interested in Film
-Why YOU can Fuckoff
AND
-Why your ideas, beliefs and feelings are completely irrelevant and why I disregard them, completely.
ALSO
-Why I hate Fat people
AND
-Conan O'brians New "Doo"

Brought to you by: Erin and The Committee Who Doesn't Give a Fuck Anymore.

You Are Pre-Approved

2004-05-12T16:07:00.000-07:00

Yoink. Yes Yoink.

I have been sick/ill/not available for a few days now. I am just here to tell you: "I am back and NO I still won't fix your computer." I get sick turn around and the semester is just gone. I have no idea where the time has gone; however, finals week is next week and then the semester is done.

My plans for summer you ask?

Well, I would like to get a job/internship with a small production company down in the L.A. area as maybe a 1st Asst. Director or Production Asst. or something. All the companies small and large are getting ready for the summer production season to begin(no rain get it?) and are hiring cast and crew feverishly. I like I would like to commute in between northern California and southern California this summer I think that would be fun. You know I would be able to keep on track career wise and still be able to see all the people who I hate on a daily basis, just kidding my dear friends. I will also probably think up more things that I would like to do.

.film
I watched some excellent films when I was sick so now I command you to view them: Boiler Room, One Hour Photo(with robin Williams) and Wall Street. If you haven't seen Wall Street yet, you have been living under some rock somewhere.

.music
Currently topping my lists of songs that I would like to have sex when listening to is "I Hate Everything About You" by Three Days Grace. Cumming in second, you ask? "Gangsta Nation" by West Side Connect Gang (Ice Cubes new group).

So Erin, what is topping the charts of songs that you have already fucked to, you ask?
Simply put: anything by the R&B/Hip-Hop group Baby Bash.

I have just ordered three, yes three, new albums. Diana Krall's Live in Paris which is a jazz album, David Banner's Baptized In Dirty Water a rap album and they gave me some new band by the name of Shinedown from florida's new album Leave A Whisper All of this for $20, that's how the rich stay rich huh?

.trivia
If you have made it this far I know you are Loyal readers so I will leave you with a trivia question.

Who, What and Where is your Spleen? (Please answer in the Comment Section, Respectfully)

Brought to you by: Erin and The Committee to support The Have You Ever Wanted to Put Your Penis in a Wall Outlet coalition. I make all my readers honor members at no extra charge. Charge, get it; Charge? Go Jump in a Lake.

Gmail...all the way.

2004-05-06T14:36:00.000-07:00

I have finally taken the time out of my busy schedule to get Gmail and I like it. I can be found at

<"metrosexual at gmail.com">

I am going to try to minimize the amount of spam that I get at this e-mail account, hence the format.

.update
Okay...Well, we have a a few new links to put up. Check out Gary's blog Bibbs Revenge, Mick's blog The Tyke and Nick's blog Indian Stallion. On the redesigning my blog thing I really have to get my head out of my ass and come up with a design that I can quickly and easily implement. Any ideas?

.music
I currently have not been listening to any particular music. I just set Winamp 5 on the "Most played" selection and it plays through my entire list of Mp3s.

Mindless Trivia: The reason why Nullsoft didn't make a Winamp 4? How would you like to say "yah, I am going to go download a Winamp-four-skin." Doesn't sound fun huh? Well then, go bath in some depleted uranium; it will whiten your teeth while your rot.

.film
Vancouver Film School called. I haven't called them back.

Brought to you by: Erin and The Committee to Hunt Down and Kill That Fat Bitch Who Stole Your Cookie When You Were Three.

Smack The Penguin

2004-05-01T13:47:00.000-07:00

No it is not a euphemism or sexual innuendo. It is a really nifty flash game. Click here to Play.

I am trying to find somewhere that will host my pictures. So as soon as I do I will post a screenshot of my high score.

Play the game and post your high score.

Get Up, Stand Up, Don't Give Up Without a Fight.

2004-04-29T02:20:00.000-07:00

Aquarius Horoscope April 29th, 2004 (courtesy of Horoscope.com)
You will be emotional and will probably find it difficult to contain the way you are feeling. Try to reason with yourself before making a scene. Counteract your anxious feeling with something energetic and physical.

Funny shit. So True.

I just did some working out and damn I feel confidant again, baby.

Enough to write:

Obsessed is a word used by some people to describe the determined.

Take it how you will, but I am back in action.

Life is Not Always what it Seems!

2004-04-28T15:33:00.000-07:00

Please, to all who have read the post "Living as if in a Dream" disregard my blatant misuse of my life energy. I now realize that I have been a huge fool for even considering to write that post or the larger consideration that lead to that post. Also if you haven't read it, yet. Go ahead and read it; it will enrich your life. (Hint: it is the post directly below this one)

I don't think I will ever attempt to have a female who is just a friend, ever again.

My life has taken an even worse turn, now K is leaving in 14 days. I have now made the decision that I am leaving at the end of the semester. I am not following her or anything. I have just had it with the scene up here. I am thinking of returning to the place of my birth, the great and glorious bay area.

.boxers
On a less dismal note I wore boxers to all my classes today, boy is college more fun in underwear. Except when the wind strikes up, especially on the updrafts it, I mean they, gets cold.

.lOl
I know you're out there watching me,
go fuck yourself and don't talk to me,
I don't need your advice,
don't need your scorn,
don't need your bullshit no more.

I can't spit rhymes its complicated
can't bump this shit I am done debating
-dedicated to some hobo under a bridge in Ohio. I have never been to Ohio before. Also I don't know any hobos least of all any in Ohio.

Living as if in a Dream

2004-04-28T03:22:00.000-07:00

It seems that through the past few days my life has changed momentously. It is strange really; how I never thought that change could come this quickly. It is rather ironic, I guess, that this is all happening in the last month of the semester when everything is reaching that high level of turmoil and the end is quickly approaching.

I don't exactly know how to start this post. I know I want to write about my experiences; however, I do not know how to state it/them in a way that would not make them seem trivial to other people.

I am really shaky at the moment on what exactly is reality and what is just a figment of my imagination or a possible fantasy of mine. It can't tell if what I was told is something small (something with low merit that usually does not require or even merit action) or if it is something larger that I can actually make an action on.

I think all my questions of reality or potential reality are completely out of left field, why would I be chosen as or could even be considered as more than a friend and why was I even told about this. Men's brains are very fragile, contrary to what we want poeple, especially women, to believe. We may have certain feelings and or thoughts that pop in to our brains at certain times and as long as those aforementioned feelings do not get out of control we can usually push them way down into our psyches somewhere in our subconscious and at least control them, in this case feelings about an other person. However, once these feelings get out of control usually through some sort of trigger by a large sudden statement usually made by a person, the entire game is up; the feelings are out of control and can no longer be hidden, pushed down into the psyche/ subconscious or controlled.

This is when a man's true feelings come out and it usually gets very weird from there on out. I am now beyond the point in which I am in total control of my feelings.

There are two sides of my brain evaluating this situation: the first being the logical side of my brain the other side being the emotional/hopeful/fantasy.

Logical: My first logical thought is I that it is an isolated event and that it probably will not happen again. This is based purely on the fact of the unavailability on the other person. It is possible that the event might happen again, but I doubt that these repeat events would have any impact on the situation and would just serve as what they are distractions.

I mean you can’t expect someone who is psychically unavailable to act on her feelings right?

I then think to myself “this was one isolated event what is the possibility that it even will occur again?” It is possible that it was so isolated that it should not even be taken into account at all. For example, if you were on road-trip and you got a good deal on some olives at a supermarket you would not go all the way back to that store for the olives because they were on sale.
My second thought based on the logical side of my brain is why would if someone is already physically unavailable how could she have any feelings for me that were intense enough to motivate her to do anything? I understand that I am definitely superior to the other; however, how could I motivate her in such a way to change adversely to the other. I know I have done it before but nothing to this level. This level includes god, whatever shape or form god may come in. I think we always harbor feelings that we are better than others and in this they are definitely coming into play.

I am then reminded of “until death do us part” lasting bond right? What if it was for the wrong reasons what if it was all just wrong? Then again what if it wasn’t. Again the doubt sets in. What if the “bond” was just to save herself the trouble of having to deal with a vicious cycle of evident bad relationships? What if it was just a copout a way to cope? Does that change anything does it make the outcome that I want more possible? Is there even an outcome that has anything do to with me? Why am I so obsessed now that I have lost control of my feelings? We have so much in common, we have such a connection why must things be complicated by this?

All questions which were raised by the logical side of my brain, when looking at this conundrum. The answers are elusive.

Emotional/Hopeful: This is the harder part to write. To make the transition from the inner depths of my mind to the page is quite challenging…maybe I am just weak. My first thought would be this is fantastic. Because of the aforementioned loss of control of the feelings/thoughts they are now right in the front of my brain there to taken into consideration with every action that I make. I am amazed at the thoughts that are now very present in my conscious. The feelings are so wonderful, so intense, and so extravagant.

In the past two days I have had such lucid dreams. In my dreams the events are breathtaking and passionate. As I said before these feelings have never been expressed in such a way, they were always considered and then quickly dismissed into the subconscious. I always thought that men and women could not be friends; we always thought that men and women could not just be friends and were we right? Yes, we hit the nail straight on the head. The passion is intense, definitely euphoric. There are single acts and then I wakeup and then I fall asleep again and I am again consumed with those same intense feelings and again they manifest themselves in multiple acts of amazing pleasure and not all being extremely sexual. Some are just moments of connection a deep connection. The dreams are surreal.

Unfortunately, my dreams are a cruel joke. They taunt me. Even in my dreams I am an idiot, an idiot who knows he is going to wakeup and be back in reality. A reality filled with no possibility of attaining what I want. A life filled with nothing that can measure up to this person; a life of inadequacies.

Even in reality at times that I totally know that I am fully awake I have visions behind my eyes. Thoughts provoking, tempting me, causing me to think about and only about her, it is amazing.

Verdict: I can’t take this unrest and life filled with doubt anymore. I just don’t know what to do about anything. The true verdict will probably be less than preferable and I just hope that I do not lose all control of my feelings prior to finals.

I have now found out that each Monday and Wednesday I was getting my fix, my fix of her; the fix that would carry me out until the next time we talked. Until now I thought nothing of it. Now I see the Light.

This Definitely Will Be Continued……Look for “Living as if in a Dream” part II in the next few days.

Am I in Love or am I in Lust? What am I in?

Curiously Interesting

2004-04-24T04:58:00.000-07:00

.attraction
I have found that over the last few weeks I have began to have interesting feelings towards Meghanraye. I can't exactly explain them. It is not that I find her incredibly attractive in the conventional way (e.g "damn she is hot, I want to fuck that women"). I really find her intriguingly attractive, I guess.

It is like she is fascinatingly weird, being attractive is just a superfluous characteristic. It is more of strange feelings that I can't really explain, I haven't had them before. Weird huh?

She, Meghanraye, is usually pretty funny, I only see her at her work place or at CR. I don't have any classes with her so I don't see her that much; however, whenever I do see her she always smells great. I don't know Meghanraye very well. Well, I have hangout with her once, but it was with a friend of mine, Darrel, who has a, lets say, interesting relationship with her. I can't really describe it, it's weird.

I don't really know what to do with her. It almost always ends up being mutual flirting, but a different type of flirting on both our parts. I think we are both being mildly reserved. Whatever, it has just been a growing feeling in the past few weeks.

Verdict: I think I would like to investigate this further; cautiously, in this case.

There are an exorbitant amount of charged atoms in this case, people.

Sidenote: I have heard she does some weird shit to guys she is dating/fucking (e.g. three months of fun and then your benched; plain English: she loses interest approximately 3 month in to the relationship).

Honi, you saw how we acted around each other what is your take (view) on this situation?

.gmail
I am considering joining gmail, googles newest beta e-mail account. I have a few friends who have joined and I am thinking of jumping on the bandwagon; I don't really know though.

.cover
The title pictures is a funny one. Caption: "Hey this isn't Europe."

.ultimatum
Well people the three (3.44976567 to be correct) month mark is quickly approaching! What am I to do?
For more info on this actan check my post [EDIT] THIS (!). It clearly defines my narcissism. I am almost out of time, almost time to move on to a better place. I am kinda excited in depressed sort of way. How is that for a sentence, huh?

Brought to you by: Erin and His Crazed Trouser Snake.

Foiled, Oh the Whorer

2004-04-21T15:58:00.000-07:00

Remember the blonde? The one from Music 12? Let me tell you the tale. SO today I was in my music class being preached Louis Armstrong and Jelly Roll Morton information like there was no tomorrow. I am looking around for that blonde chick so I could make some headway. If you remember I thought she was mildly hot. Anyway, I didn't see her till later in the class when she came in late and sat next to me.

The Bad part:
After class I engaged her in conversation, something about some movie list or something. I don't really remember, that was just an "ice breaker" if you know what I mean. So, we are chatting about different class stuff (boring). I come to find out: she has a boyfriend. Lame, Lame, Lame. Oh and her boyfriend is in a band. Manic, ha, local crap.

Now it just seems like to much work for me. Taking someone's girlfriend from them takes a lot of time and energy. I can't spare that much, not for her at least. Don't get me wrong, I CAN, HAVE and WILL, steal girlfriends from people it just takes time and energy.

.useless.knowledge
2% of visitors to my blog are Running a Macintosh based Operating System.
1% of my traffic is from Norway.

.attraction
Okay so the blonde is out. How about a little brunette on the menu? There is this mildly attractive chick in my Journalism 5 class. Haven't engaged in conversation yet; but now is a good of a time as any right? She wears sandals all the time and has a funky little toe ring on her middle toe…kinda cute.

.quoted
My favorite statement that I have heard in the recent past was spoken by a dear friend of mine. We were speaking about the amount of sexual partners that each of us had uh…fucked. So she blurts out:

"Do women count?"

I responded, "are you kidding me? Women count as two!" Oh did I mention I think women fucking each other are hot? Well they are. Don't like women fucking each other? Well then you need to go have your head examined. It is some seriously sensual shit.

.redesign
I think I might have to get onto the band wagon and spruce up this little blog here. Maybe a little paint and a boost controller and some PHP and ASP scripting, that will teach you people to hide your IP addresses better.

.search
Wow, I am popping up all over the internet. I am having quite a few search engines link to me.

2nd on AOL Search for my use of Beoncye Knowles:
http://aolsearch.aol.com/aol/search?query=Beoncye+Knowles

5th on Google for Bidibodi Bidibu:
http://www.google.de/search?hl=de&ie=UTF-8&oe=UTF-8&q=%22Bidibodi+Bidibu%22+mid&meta=

#1 on Google for “what was called "F & U" in the film mother.”

5th on Google for "Don't Go Making Phony Calls":
http://www.google.com/search?q=%22Don%27t+Go+Making+Phony+Calls%22&hl=en&lr=&ie=UTF-8&oe=UTF-8&start=10&sa=N

And I am getting a huge amount of hits from Jaeger’s site. Thanks Babe.

Those are sites that people have clicked through to get to my page. I am listed on other search engines around, but I guess I am not getting referrals from them, yet.

Brought to you by: Erin and The Fingerlicking Goodness of a Women Near You. Mhhm tastes like chicken.

The Smell of Sex

2004-04-14T13:47:00.000-07:00

Okay, it seems that over the course of writing this bog I have made, what some women believe to be, highly sexist comments in the posts: Gone Fishing and We Gots People Commin

I have not and will never make excuses for the things I have said or written; however, I will justify my thoughts and ideas so that, my listeners or in this case readers, will understand what they did not comprehend before and thus be enlightened.

Let me begin by stating that A Metrosexuals Bathroom Wall is not rated G. As my music professor said, "In this course I may use quote, "curse" words and well if anyone is offended by that then you can fuck off."

.sex
As we all know and have found out throughout our lives sex plays an important role in society. Not just the act of fucking but also gender and the role gender bias plays in ones life.

I am not a woman so it is hard, at times, to connect and identify with everything that women say and believe. Furthermore, any woman who says she can connect and identify with everything men think and exhibit is just plain lying. It is a simple fact that men and women just will not agree on everything. This, however, is not justification for extreme rudeness.

In my post Gone Fishing there was absolutely no bias on my part at all. I was simply posting my response to the quote. The post was NOT about men and women's genitals and the differences in smells and physiology, it was a response to the statement made by another person. If the comment board for that post is checked everyone will plainly see that there are quite a few comments on the subject, none of which are biased they are simply stating facts.

.sexist
The definition of someone who is sexist is:
"discriminatory on the basis of sex n: a man with a chauvinistic belief in the inferiority of women" [This according to dictionary.com (if anyone wants to try to argue with me)]

Someone please tell me (and cite sources) of how I could be construed as a man who thinks that women are inferior. The first source that people would probably try to use is my use of Friedrich Nietzsche's quote "When a woman becomes a scholar there is usually something wrong with her sexual organs." This taken from my post We Gots People Commin.

If anyone knows anything about Nietzsche, he was a very interesting German philosopher and just as when taking all philosophers in to account it must be reminded that not everybody believes all philosophies equally. My justification for using this quote was that I had just seen Meg Ryan's new film In The Cut. A horrible film which is two and a half hours of ludicrous gratuitous bullshit. And guess what- she is an English professor.

.redefine.your.mind
I do very firmly believe that women are beautiful, glorious creatures who should be appreciated.

Also as most women believe and I am in perfect agreement here, women through the course of time have been forced into a role of subservience. I am, however, one of the largest male supporters of gender equality. The Vagina Monologues were superb as well as V-Poetry and other similar events. It saddens me and also offends me that someone would consider me a sexist.

Believe what you want, but (in this case) what you believe is wrong.

.reiteration
As I made it (obiviously not so clear) in Gone Fishing, it has alwaybeen my experience that women both smell and taste great (especially blondes, but brunettes are also very yummy). Also, Honi, who is responsable for this blog post here, remineded me that the "fishy" smell deal is really just a gender based sterotype.

.verdict
Women rock, smell, taste and feel great and most are super intelligent, attractive and awesome people. Futhermore, I am not sexist

Brought to you by: Erin and The Pressuring Statements of a Women Near You. I hope this lays to rest all your doubts ladies, especially Honi.

May I Bore You More Sir?

2004-04-14T01:36:00.000-07:00

I can't seem to understand this I have quite a few hits while the comments that are left are not existent; they don't exist. Lets have some commenting people.

.create
I have done just that. I am once again heavily writing poetry. I have also started to write in rap, which contrary to what people believe is easier than slicing sliced bread. I would post a small piece of what I write up here; however, I don't think that I would like to do that right now. Now, it is not because of a lack of confidence. I walked around an entire day in just my boxers and the fly thing on the front didn't even have any kind of closure. I was precariously position and was hoping that I wouldn't flash an old lady when walking down the street.

I did get a few crotch looks from rather attractive chicks though. Always a plus.

.bloggshit
Well blogger fucked me over again crapping out and deleting half my post on a reload and I am to tired to continue this charred. I had some good stuff written down too.

Savvy No..

2004-04-11T21:32:00.001-07:00

Entrepreneurial Maybe...

I told you I would be back. Here I am.

.deep.thought
I really like tongue rings. I mean it is not just how they feel, that is beside they point right now; I will discuss it later. They are really kinky looking. I can't really explain it though, kinda like my affinity towards chicks that wear white pants or white belts or a combination of the two. I just really like them. I did however say that I would talk about how they feel and yes they most definitely feel very good. I don't know if you, my readers, chicks or guys have ever been pleasured by someone who has a tongue ring but it is very nice, quite enjoyable. I would highly recommend it to both sexes male and female, this one goes out to you Honi (snicker, snicker).

And she thought I wouldn't harass her like she harasses me. Ha. But seriously find someone who has a tongue ring and get them to go down on you. (Oh and Honi there is more to come).

.music
Lil Flip - Rollin on 20s, is my current addiction. I also very much addicted to Mariah Carey's - Heartbreaker, Monster Magnet - Look to Your Orb For The Warning and The Deftones - My own Summer.

[All these and more available on Rip-It-Now Records in Association with K-Lite Records And Nero Burning Productions.]

.you're.taking.notes.right
Remember if any chick asks you "how did Erin get so damn good" just point them towards My Moto.

.simulation
I just got the crazy idea to play The Sims. I am going to try to find the game disc now (the game is so 1999). I will name a character after my favorite cannibal, Favio.

Brought to you by: Erin and The Committee To Free The Weasel. Oh he is coming out. Be prepared, be very prepared.

2004-04-11T21:32:00.000-07:00

I Owe You One

2004-04-11T13:50:00.000-07:00

I don't know what is wrong with me, but, for some strange reason I can't seem to blog. My last post was a long time ago, for me that is. Truly, I used to be addicted to blogging, sometimes I still am; however, recently I JUST can't blog.

I have been working really hard the last few days. I am attempting to make my current "business opportunities" fruit. Fruit dammit, fruit. They are stubborn sometimes.

I am trying to upgrade my two cars (the Zx2 and the PORSCHE) with different performance parts; however I really need to stay focused and buy a prosumer DV camera (Canon XL1s all the way).

I am still going to be a Filmmaker you know.

.weak
I am feeling quite weak due to the fact that I have not been to the gym since the 21st. Oh vanity thy name is Erin. I am hoping I can congole myself into going to gym today. My Vanadyl Sulfate should be here soon, that is a good thing. I was thinking of mixing in some creatine too, but I dont know.

.buuh Yaah
I just went bike riding. Nope I couldn't convince myself to go to HealthSport, but I went a nice long and fast bike trek, it was awesome. I feel so much stronger and energized.

.end.game
I don't really have any notable news in this post..

To Be Continued......

Gone Fishing

2004-04-06T18:53:00.000-07:00

So I was reading blogs and I came across this quote:

"Beer and women or beer and fishing? They both leave your mouth with a fishy taste"
-Evan

.response
I have never had this experience. Thank god. I think that would be one of the most fucked up things to be smelling/tasting when going down on a women. I will just cross my fingers that I don't get the fresh trout on my plate, if you know what I mean.

Also, If anybody has experienced this nasty (fishy) phenomenon please post your fishy experience in the comments.

Brought to you by: Erin and The Soap Makers Association of America. Also brought to you by the letters F & U and the numbers 6 & 9

Fuck Dis an Fuck Dat, Get Da Fuck Back

2004-04-06T17:36:00.000-07:00

Weird, I haven't blogged since March 31st. I just don't have any time and I haven't been in the mood.

If any of my readers have seen "A Beautiful Mind" they will remember the scene at the beginning of the film when Nash (Crow) states that he doesn't go to class because it doesn't leave him any time to come up with his "original thought." The very same idea can be applied to my life at this very moment; I have no time at all to do anything that is enjoyable. I have no time for creativity, I have no time to think.

.christ
I think I am very similar to christ in that I must suffer for others sins. Now I am not usually a religious person so this is weird coming out of my mouth. I dabble in all religions not a one single one, but that is beside the point.

I have seen that when I am happy, enjoying myself, expressing creativity and generally having a positive outlook on life everyone else around me is having a horrible time, nothing is going right for them and they generally feel rotten. However, when ever anyone else starts expressing semi-long bursts of pleasure, I begin to feel bad and everything unravels in my life, thus I must suffer.

.tickle.me.this
on a humorous note I think people are addicted to sex. I know I have said it before but I really think it is true. Oh did i mention it is fun? Well it is. It most defiantly is.

I also think that people are addicted to talking about sex. You know on the off chance that they are not having it at that exact moment.

.music
Hmm. Lets see in the music department I have a quiz in Music 12 tomorrow which I should really be preparing for, but whatever I have all night right? I am currently listening to (not addicted, yet) Frank Sinatra, Suzanne Vega (okay I am addicted to her), and the Usual suspects (Nickelback - Someday, Evanscence - My Immortal and of course Toxic). I also just heard some song by Beoncye Knowles (or however you spell her name) that I think is sexy I think it is called "Sexy."

.film
I have learned about a potential directing opportunity some acting people would like to make a very very very small movie. One of the people in the group asked if I would like to get involved. I am still working on getting a camera all it takes is the excess cash. Oh believe me it is coming.

.newspaper
Fucking ASCR finally told me I would get the money for the newspaper website. Shit it took a long fucking time. Anyway that is still a possibility of making something mediocre before the semester is over. Such potential just wasted. Fuck me, people are incompetent.

.porsche
woohoo, I took it out for a spin today and I have been missing driving it. The wind in my hair, the little rice boys dropping like flies, yah they were choking on my dust, well actually my exhaust and my dust. It was fun.

.k
Darrel met K. Well not actually met just talked (I didn't introduce them). Yah that's all I have to say on K at this time.

.end.game
I don't really have anything else to say; remember that lapse in creativity? Yah it is plaguing me.

Brought to you by: Erin and The Committee to Promote Bureaucracy. The antichrist to creativity.

Note: For the people how can't seem to find the comments button it is right next to my name to the right of the time the post was posted.

How it All Works

2004-03-31T21:17:00.000-08:00

It seams that my computer is still somewhat malfunctioning. It is kinda screwy..I don't really know what is wrong yet. At least I got it running again, those hours hunched over my keyboard are still worth something huh?

The semester is coming to an end; I think there are about 5 and 1/2 more weeks left in the semester...Thank god. Summer plans anyone? It is now time to batten down the hatches and ride out the storm. For me that means no more slacking off and starting to put some real attention into school. Last semester I didn't do shit and I got a 3.00 so hopefully this semester, I did Some work I promise, I hope I will have at least a 3.8. Yay for GPA bolstering.

I don't really have time to write a long Blog so I will try to keep it short; I really should be studying for midterms and all.

.this.just.in

I had an amazing thought and have just acquired an excellent money making idea and I am in the process of implementing it. Also, I am still feeling under the weather, making it hard to want to do things.

Earlier today I had an interesting conversation with Honi (I see her Mondays and Wednesday only). She seems to think that women are more creative than men and what ensued was a mock argument (at least on my end) about sexism and gender bias. I thought it was mildly fun and mildly amusing.

.makin'.da.bank

I have reorganized my petition thingee and have hired a couple of people to "help" me. Really they will be just getting people to sign the petitions for an hourly wage. This allows me to keep all the "profits." I am being paid by the signature, so more for me. Don't we all like growth?

.in.closing

I really should be doing other things so I will leave you with a simple explanation...

"If I hadn't done any of the things I have done in my lifetime, would I have not influenced millions of people."
-Me

Remember everything is cyclical.

Brought to you by: Erin and The Committee to Promote Weight Loss Programs for Americans. Did you know that over 81% of Americans are overweight or obese? Fucking Fatasses! I'm glad I am not in that 81 percent.

Take That...I Beat You

2004-03-30T19:48:00.000-08:00

Woohoo...I have the good old computer running again. It just took some tinkering. It was the BIOS and I did spank it.. Good and hard that is.

Well, I was talking to a friend of mine Honi yesterday, while sticking, sorting and messing around with labels for art event postcards, when she provoked my thought processes... It is strange how someone who you know so casually can sometimes make you think so much. She made me think about how I am really and truly lost here in Humboldt county...More on this later.

She also made me think about love, life and the small things that we all must go through. I hope that this friendship will deepen. It is always hard to have good friends (and just friends) who are women because that damn sex thing almost always seems to pop up (pun intended). In this situation we are spared that pain, Honi is married.

San Francisco was a success, sort of. I am tired of people mucking around with my business, you know fucking my plans up. This is an increasing trend in my life and I am fucking pissed off about it. I just can't stand when you have something in your mind as the way you want to do something and then someone changes it all or tries to change parts of and it just serves to mess everything up. Who thinks I should just go become a hermit?

On a side note, I am also fed up with people who do not have a backbone. Come on people don't be chicken shits here grow a BUCKING backbone. I am not naming names. heh heh protecting the guilty.

I have stopped writing. I got sick again..Somehow. It really isn't bad, my doctor says he thinks it is a allergy. In all fairness that's what I told him I thought it was so... Anyway, I am just feeling really lethargic and I don't really want to do anything. I haven't been to the gym in forever and I think I might have lost the small gains I made, oh well. I always have more time don't I, wait I forgot about my 3 month deal *rolls eyes* -sigh- oh well.

Hopefully, in the near future I will be able to start writing again at least in a small fashion. I know I just said I started writing again, shit these things go in cycles. Talk to me in a few days I will probably be blabbering about some new fascinating idea about something that would make a great film.

.film

On the subject of film, I almost went and saw The Dreamers down in the bay area, looks really sexy. Did I mention it is French and NC-17, perfect for Erin. I will probably rent it, maybe with K.

.random.thoughts

I just came across this Picture. I think it is really cool. The picture really couldn't be called pornography (no genitals in action)and it couldn't be called a picture without emotion, yet it moves me nonetheless. I don't exactly know how but it does.

.music

wow, I know I haven't posted a blog lately so I think I need a change of obsession. I am currently addicted to "The Unforgiven II" by Metallica. I have just become (again), as of this second, addicted to "Rape Me" by Nirvana. I dedicate this song to that special someone.

I have found I am like Isaac Gershwin of Gershwin & Gershwin (composers of music in the 1930) I am in love with someone; however I don't know who she is.

.fuckupdate

I am thinking of inviting K down to the city in a couple of weekends from now; I think she would enjoy it and I know I would enjoy it. All you of people who are not from the bay area, the city is San Francisco.

Also in the fuckupdate, I miss S, actually I miss both the Ss. Yah there were two of them. One this year and one last, both had great breasts. Okay that was mildly shallow I know but I still like them. No, we didn't break up or anything that was probably because with both Ss we never actually went out it was more of a fucking (making love) thing. The I am speaking about now is the S of this year. It is funny how things turn out.

I am becoming more vocal in my sexploits (at least blog wise), hee hee. Honi said that's what people REALLY want to read about. Are you getting enough Honi? Just kidding.

I did promise lots of gratuitous sex didn't I?

.attraction

This is a new little sub-heading, I just thought I would share with you, my readers, the chicks who I am attracted to at this moment.

Well there is this really hot blonde in my Music 12 (popular music circa 1950) class who I am thinking of hitting on. I just noticed her, maybe she is new or something. It is awesome, she has style without dressing slutty. Working on that connection eh?

Hey, I always have to be thinking about at least three chicks (women) at the same time or I feel weird.

.nude.people.rawk

I borrowed the sub-title from inna, I am not paying you royalties, just playing. Anyway, I went around most of last Sunday (March 27th) without pants on, just boxers and damn was it fun. Some friends and I went to the beach, multiple stores and the casino and to all of these places we went: me without pants, oh ya. I am thinking of starting a trend: all boxers, all the time.

Honi says she will pay me $10 if I come to the College of the Redwoods in just boxers for an entire day, sounds like a good deal to me. The whole Sunday boxers only experience was fucking awesome; I will be doing it a lot more often. I heard it is sexi, like Porsches.

Brought to you by: Erin and The Committee to Enforce Mandatory Masturbation. Everyone should love themselves every once and a while.

Back Up Whatcho' Got? Whatcho' Got?

2004-03-25T00:00:00.000-08:00

Bing...Cherry vanilla. I am feeling kind of gangsta'rae at the moment. I don't exactly know why but fuck it, I am feelin good. I am ready to bust my pistols baby. I am feeling Machiavellian. Now where did I park my iced out Escalade? *looks around*

.beanz
My bicep size has went up a 1/4 of an inch in 2 weeks so i am stoked. I am feelin large, though you can always be bigger right? I actually should have gone to the gym earlier this even; however, I was just too fucking tired. I am really working on my upper body.

In the next few weeks I will begin to supplement with Vanadyl Sulfate and possibly Creatine. I really am going for the largest size I can achieve, while still not looking like a prune with a small head that is. You know the senario where the athletes body is to large for his head, that shit just looks weird.

.sign.now.bitch
I have just became a petitioner. You know getting people to sign issues they don't really understand, that kind of thing. I was in front of Costco earlier today and I asked a chick "excuse me could you spare a second," I followed with "We are trying to keep local taxes local, in the community." Do you know what she said "NO THANKS". I guess she wants her local tax money to go to Texas. Voters are so fucking stupid. It is funny.

I also got kicked off Eureka Natural foods property which surprised me; I am calling the owners to complain. I usually shop at their store so it upsets me that they are not doing their share to promote the political process. Speaking of getting kicked of property Costco also kicked me off. *shakes head* It makes me feel very unhopeful for the proper results this November.

.music
Current addiction: The Transplants "Down in Oakland." They fucking rock. Also on the small glass mirror on my coffee table (razor blade not included): Beethoven - "Fur Elise", 2Pac - the entire "All Eyez on Me" Album, Evanesence - "My Immortal", Nelly - "Airforce Ones", and Lil' Flip - "Rollin on 20s."

.fuck
This word is just so awesome. I am saying to myself as I write this and I just have to say Fuck (The F word) is just so amazing and very versatile. I think everyone should use it more, it is underused by churchgoers, Christians, grocery store attendants, police officers, your mother, and many more people, including little children. They should use the word more too. I you don't agree with me than fuck you.

I would like to quote one of music professors, "in the course of this semester I might use some vulgarity as a teaching tool, also some vulgarity may pop up in the excerpts of songs that we listen to; if you get offended by vulgarity such as this, well then you can fuck off." Quite a profound statement isn't it?

.my.good.vestments
I desperately need to do some shopping for clothes. I haven't got my shopping fix, you know that high you get when you find that awesome $85 shirt that goes with your $75 pants. Ya, I haven't had that since early January, curse that Macy's is not in my immediate area. I think I am want some new Sean John or Rocawear shit. And I am defiantly looking for some new DKNY and Claiborne.

I have also got a hankering for a new pair of shoes to add to my collection. I am looking at these spiffy black square toes for $150, oo baby. Shoes are sexy. Yes I do have a substance abuse problem, footwear. I am very choosy when it comes to footwear though so blue Puma's are not going to cut it (inside joke).

.PORSCHE
Spring is back baby....The Porsche is coming out the garage. I need to spruce it up for summer trolling, for hootchies that is. I am so glad that is finely getting sunny on a regular basis, it means I can take the top off without a fear of being berated with a hail of rain drops and getting my precious leather interior wet. A thought on the interior, I should really think about replacing my carpet all through; I am thinking of a factory black.

I still want to put some banging subs in the rear jumps seats, it is a 911 Targa so it doesn't really have a back seat. I came up with this great design idea for some awesome looking woofer boxes, all leather covered and match my interior perfectly and shit.

.in.stock
Fuck yes it is. I am going to start investing in stocks. It is something I have been wanting to do for a while now so I think this would definitely be an appropriate time to dabble in the stock market. Also, the market isn't super turbulent at the moment which translates into less risk for me. I found a great stock broker. Scottrade is only $7 a trade, that is an industry low. Totally awesome price. If anyone wants to start dabbling in stock as well, I would recommend at least investigating Scottrade.

.free.(pants).associate.(sex)
I am going to try a free association section where I just write shit that comes to my head. It is mildly random, but whatever.

I was thinking If a sign says "No Shirt, No Shoes, No Service," does that mean Pants are optional? This brings us to my second question are pants always mandatory in all social situations. I think I might try going somewhere with no pants on and see what people say/think. Oh before I go on that little expedition I will be requesting people to send me bail money.

On the subject of pants, I think everyone's pants should come off a lot more. If everything is driven by sex I am not seeing that a lot of people are having it. I think everyone who is qualified to have sex should fuck at least once every week. I think we might have to come up with a better means of birth control if we initiate that.

There are some people that just shouldn't have sex, they just pose to much a risk if they get pregnant and fuck up the gene pool. The Darwin Awards are helping us rid ourselves of these people or is it the people who are helping us. Who knows, no really who knows- go ask her.

You know what is fucking annoying the Blogger Spell Checker doesn't recognize proper words. Senario is one that it seems to have a real problem with. Shitty Inferior Technology, or is that inferior engineers.

If your reading this right now...Take Your Pants Off. You know you will like it. Note: I would not recommend following my advice if your in a public place as I will not be taking any responsibility for your public nudity charges.

Brought to you by: Erin and The Committee to Promote Da' Tap Dat Ass Campaign.

New Friends...Again

2004-03-23T10:50:00.000-08:00

We have new friends to The Metrosexual. The first of the new friends blogs is The Jaeger Files by Elle (Jaeger). I am not sure how Elle found me and my bathroom wall; however, I am glad it happened. Jaeger Files is awesome so check it out now.

The Second is A New York Girl by Inna, she is really funny everyone should check out her site. You better add me Inna. The Third and final new friend is Fuck Everthing writer Sagara Sousuke. This is the weirdest blog I have ever read but it is fucking awesome. Check it out.

An oldie but goodie is The Compendium. Writing credit: Darrel. Get down wit your bad self dude.

.update
New links and what-not should be up as soon as humanly possible. Do I see a new layout coming? Maybe.

Brought to you by: Erin - Da' Man Wit Da Plan and a PORSCHE.

Even the Score

2004-03-22T23:33:00.000-08:00

Wow, now we don't ever need to put the seat down again. Thanks to the Magic Cone. Watch the How to Video Here. I am totally sure we will see these little paper trinkets popping up in the little 25 cent machines in women's bathrooms all over the world. Isn't it quite phalic? Oh, did I mention it makes a great gift?

The good thing is that it will result in a lower use of telephone booths in Manhattan.

.nude people
So I have been doing that research I was telling you all about; however, I think I will have to wait until later this week to do the "hands on" research. This is due to the unavailability of a certain someone, she shall be known as K. More nude people info coming soon.

.music
Addiction is a horrible thing. My current addiction musically speaking is "bidibodi bidibu" by Dj Bubbles. It is the techno in the Porsche scene in the film Super Troopers.

Paid for by: Erin and The Magic Cone "Chicks with paper dicks."

ah an idea hits

2004-03-22T03:52:00.000-08:00

.idea
I have just had the formation of a very interesting potential idea. It is astounding the timing of these things. If you have the same small piece of an idea come popping into your repeatedly does that mean it is time to take it seriously? I thinks so. Also is the dot.com dead?

.music
I am currently addicted to Metallica's Unforgiven II. Okay, I am probably addicted to other musical choices as well, namely toxic; however, I really would not like to go into that at this moment.

.fuck.them
Fuck those Israeli fucks, and their Jewish religion to boot. Read about what they did here.

.end
I probably wouldn't have wrote a blog at this hour even though I am awake, but the Israeli's really pissed me off and I got that great buisness opportunity idea. I had to share it with someone and everyone I know is asleep.

.coming.soon
expect something about naked people coming soon. I will be doing heavy research on this topic in the upcoming week.

Brought to you by: Erin and paid for by the kindness of Google's advertising dollars. Oh and my blood, sweat and tears.

We Gots People Commin

2004-03-21T03:45:00.000-08:00

It is early and my spring break starts tomorrow- what else can I say?

Update:
In the very near future my little old blog should be getting a large amount of hits okay maybe I am overshooting a little bit. In any event my blog should get at least a few new hits. As everyone who reads this has seen I have updated the look a little (look to the right). I am also planning major updates in layout/template. I know, I know- I am addicted. I have been going to many other blogger's sites and "recruiting" them for linkage. I only put the very best on my blog too, so feel privileged.

.for.all.the.new.readers.
If you haven't heard yet I am going to be a filmmaker. Don't give me any of that "oh your never going to make it" crap either. I know that I am going to do it and that is that. I am still questing away for that "connection." The going is getting easier and I am currently attempting to further my "connectionism." If you ever thought that you could fly this is the time to try. I don't know where that came form but it fits perfectly to the above subject. I will have more for you new readers later on. If you really want to know more , though it is not going to give you much, you can check out my past posts.

.connect
On the subject of Brooke, I have no idea where she has got to; however I hope she has not died. I think I saw her a couple days ago, but I was in a hurry and could not stop to find it out if it was indeed her. Oh well. I have not given up on her. She is still in consideration, maybe not, who knows. There are others, oh yes- there are others. There are always others.

.dream
I had the weirdist dream last night. I can't remember exactly what it was about, but I have scribbled preliminary ideas in my "script log" and I am thinking it has the potential to be a film. Weird huh? On the subject of dreams, Marissa has really gotten me into thinking about dreams, as potential filmmaking ideas that is. She has a shit load of ideas on dreams she has had and how she thinks they would make good films or at least aspects of films. I tend to agree on some of her dreams.

.life
I am loving at the moment. Who would have know. I am on a really weird sleep cycle and I am addicted to The Modern Gentlemen. Now I don't need tips on how to act. I just saw this book on the shelf at Borders and had to pick it up. It was either this or "Bad Girl Poetry." It is great. It has a classic style about it that reminds me of Fred Astaire and Old Blue Eyes with a modern spin on them, it is awesome. I recommend it for all who would like to be or already are gentlemen.

.music
I am currently addicted to "High Roller" by Crystal Method, "Someday" by Nickelback, Toxic by Britney, and Symphony no. 40 by Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart.

I have vowed not to end this blog with: "I wish I had more to say" or "okay well I am tired, so I am going to sleep," instead I will end it with a badass quote and of course the brought to you by statement.

"When a woman becomes a scholar there is usually something wrong with her sexual organs."
-Friedrich Nietzsche

Thank You America and Goodnight!

Brought to you by: Erin and The Committee To Fuck Bush. Vote in November People.

Anachronism at Its Best

2004-03-17T18:21:00.000-08:00

It seems that whenever I should be writing a speech I am writing a Blog. This Blog post is displaced out of the chronological placement of time and thus its name.

This is in response to certain events that transgressed Friday of last week and Monday of this week. I just don't understand some people’s misguided and misshapen ethical views. You people might think that the issues I am responding to are trivial; however, they are not.

March 12, 2004

I have been "invited" to my friend’s dual birthday parties. In my circle we combine birthdays that occur in the same month, I think it is a type of copout.

It is probably really based on the fact that most of us don't really care about when or who's birthday it is and we are just to spineless to tell everyone about our little problem.

Anyway, my friends told me that they wanted me to be present at their collective birthdays and that we would do X amount of stuff. Well to open the fucker up with a bang, we are scheduled to begin reveling at 2:00PM; however, people have issues and decide to start early. They call me mid-revel to say "we will either be at Los bagels or Crosswinds so come find us at one of those." I am thinking to my self "no we didn't have plans at a certain time, lets just fuck up the entire schedule." "Sounds good to me."

So now you’re thinking, "okay Erin that doesn't sound too bad they just don't give a shit about plans." There is more so get ready.

Once I found them at Los Bagels, I was reminded that we were going to spend the day with one of the people who I hate the most. You have heard of him, his name is Fatass. The reason we are going to hangout with him? It is HIS birthday too. Does anyone remember what my friends did on my birthday? Jack Shit. Did they even remember what day was? fuck NO. 50% of the friends that know him dislike him.

Now I am faced with the fact that my friends are complete fucking assholes who care more about a stupid fat fuck who they obviously dislike and put down at every opportunity, than me. But that's the way it goes huh? Maybe a change in scenery would help. Moving anyone?

Well I decide that this Fatass plan is complete bullshit, and for the first time in a long while I am completely honest with my friends. Amazing isn't it? I tell them that hanging out with Fatass is fucking bullshit and that I hope he dies, I also told them what I outlined in the above paragraph about my birthday and all. Unfortunately they didn't really care. So I was forced, if I wanted to hangout, to deal with the situation like an adult; just not talk to the fat fuck at all. The Silent treatment. I attempted to get my other friend to do it and he broke down the first five minutes we were around the little bitch. *shakes my head* The incompetence.

There is more that happened on this day; however, it doesn't really relate to my topic so...Another time perhaps.

March 15, 2004

I am driving back from SacTown in the big ass van, when who should call but my friend Darrel. They reception was bad and I didn't really know why he called. However, I did find out, when I asked if he wanted me to stop by on my way home, that he was cooking with Paul (One of the ones with the birthday on the 12th). Funny no invitation, this didn't really surprise me though. As it is with cellphones being used in the middle of the redwoods, our connection was lost and I was not able to call him back until about 9:30 when we got into Eureka. So, while I am driving home in my car I gave him a call at home and left a message on his machine; I also called his pager and paged him.

Lets flash forward to me having been home for about 30 minutes. I get a call from Darrel saying "Hey me and Paul didn't decide to cook, instead, he brought over some crew team people and we are hanging out." We banter for a few minutes and Darrel makes the ending-the-conversation-comment "so I am going to retire." I then retort with "okay whatever," I don't think he caught the disdain in my voice though. Once again did anyone see an offer of invitation? I didn't.

March 17, 2004

I have just read a certain person's Blog posting and it gave me that last kick in the pants to write this post. Through reading the Blog I have found out that they actually had a "party" of sorts. Thanks Guys. I now know that I can't seem to rely on anyone to have any sense of decency.

On a side note, I am tired of people calling me when they are bored. I m not talking about people when they are bored calling you up and asking if you want to do something. No I am talking about people who are in between studying sessions and call you up to "chat" and then mid-chat go " oh I have to go and do more homework, bye." Surprisingly I have actually been told "okay it past my bed time, I have to get up early for crew," in one sentence, and "I am going to give him a call later tonight." When confronted the person on the other side of the phone just laughed and said "yah I just didn't want to talk to you anymore." I think the meaning of this story is I need a whole new group of core friends.

Epilogue

I am again using speech time to nurse my inferior human psyche. If only we were all higher beings, right? I am going to try to write this speech for tomorrow (I haven’t started yet) and I will leave my readers with a little food for thought.

If readers are leaders why is our President a bumbling idiot with an IQ of 85?

It makes you think doesn't it?

Brought to you by: Erin and The Committee to Promote Knowledge in Schools.

SAC ATTACK

2004-03-16T23:10:00.000-08:00

I am back...back from my attack on SAC-TOWN. I have returned from the "March in March." We marched on the capital in protest of the tuition hikes. I do not know if we were successful in forcing the governor and the legislators to lower the tuition; however I am sure we will not see our tuition going up in the next fiscal year. And as YOUR god is MY witness I will be in front of the capital building next year protesting for lower tuition. All I can say is the trip was quite interesting, the hotel sucked and the march on the captial building was fucking awesome. I was mildly saddened to see that not many newpapers reported on it; however, if we,the protestors, had started fucking shit up and breaking things you know we would have made CNN.

In related news, the paper is still at a stand still waiting for fiduciary support. I also seem to have some sort of sickness again, I am sure it is from the hot tub at the hotel we stayed at, uggh.

On Thursday I have a speech due; I decided to speak on the "March in March. We shall see how it goes. I don't but I feel like I have a bad feeling about this informative speech. Cross your fingers for me.

I should have more to say when I have more time to think philosophicly, until then..

Brought to you by: Erin and The Committee to Keep The Doors Open. You heard me Arnold

PUMA This or PUMA That: Do you do RED or do you do BLUE.

2004-03-10T17:55:00.000-08:00

I am searching around the Internet shopping for shoes and what do I come across? Well footwear advertisements from PUMA. They are very interesting. The first advertisement is rather provocative. The Second even more so.

Doesn't it just make you want to buy PUMA shoes. I know I want some. Buy her the purse and the shoes and you might get seconds.

Brought to you by: Erin and The Committee to Put Salt in YOUR Game. That means more for me suckas

Which Way is The Highway?

2004-03-09T22:42:00.000-08:00

A friend of mine once said, "If I ever get depressed, it will be because, in this world without a purpose or meaning, I didn't do what I wanted to do when I had the chance." I think this is beyond profound and should be accredited to the writer. Darrel your statement was profound. Enough affirmation of your ego yet? No, well that can't be fixed now.

When studying this statement we find that everyone has had this feeling of, "oh shit I should have just gone for it." Most people just haven't been able to find the correct words to express it so eloquently. I think now that it, the statement, has been released to the world I will begin to follow it down to the T. It will definitely aid me the crazy thing I am always yammering on about: the "connection." I have found that about 75% of the time I am not doing what I actually wanted to when I had the chance and it seems that I am losing out, which I am.

I would now like to pose a question. Is it possible? Could one drop out of life? I have no Idea if it is possible, but much like dropping a class or dumping a women it seems that it is a very possible and maybe would be quite effective, if used correctly that is. I have yet to investigate this possibility and in the many weeks ahead of me I shall delve deep into the inner workings of this idea.

unfortunately, it seems that all my posts this week have had a semiquaspsuedo dismal tone. Why such the cynicism you ask? Possibly for the fun of it, I have no idea. Ask Sigmund Freud he might know, then again he was a fascist, wacko, pervert. Okay, the pervert part may be okay, however the rest of Freud's attributes are not satisfactory for me.

In related news in this beautiful county of ours, my friend Paul's birthday is coming up on Friday. On a normal occasion this would probably be a joyous event; however, it is a high possibility that I will be subjected to the horrors, terrors and the unintelligence (that is putting it lightly) of a certain Fatass. Oh well, there is always the possibility he will fall off a cliff right? A very high cliff, with sharp rocks and stuff at the bottom. It is also Ben's birthday on Friday, at least we are celebrating it on Friday.

On the subject of Fatass that large, rotund, piece of shit has fucked me over so many times. Most of the "fucked over" times include me lending him money and him never paying it back or that Fatass braking my stuff; cars, lamps, gym equipment, the works. He pissed me off so much that a few months, actually many months, ago I told him in not so many words, "fuck off." In actuality I just never called him back. Haha, sucks to be him.

This post seems have too many unrelated topics within it. I think that in the future I will attempt to us one blog per topic or at least not free associate that often.

Brought to you by: Erin and The Committee to Legalize Free Food

Que La Chinga: Am I Doing?

2004-03-09T01:47:00.000-08:00

Note: Hmm...Well I was working on a blog and saved it as a "draft" when ta-da Blogger fucked up and it is gone so I now must start again...Oh the horror. All my musing gone, gone forever.

I truly, as the title says, don't know what the fuck I am doing. Seriously. I don't have a slights idea of what I am doing in this place. I am lost. I know in the long run I want to be a director, a filmmaker; however, it seems that I am descending in to this never ending pit of despair. I know that it is not depression, not the temporary syndrome of lose serotonin. I know that it is not just this geographical location that I am in, it is my entire frame of mind that is causing this "despair". I feel trapped; yet, I cannot tell if it is others who are trapping me or myself. I can't quite decided what to do in this type of situation. I do know that my problem is deeply rooted in absence of a "connection" or "connections." To aid in your understanding.....

Let me relate an anecdote that poses a somewhat interesting conundrum. I was sitting, speaking with a friend in a library a few days ago when quite suddenly, and multiple times at that, we where passed by a very attractive women. Now this chick had the three BBB (think about it is an acronym). My friend leans over to me after the third passing and asks, "so, how do YOU think one goes about getting a chick like that?" I just look at him. For it is my experience that most chicks who are "attractive" are quite boring. That situation really does pose an interesting question: "How does one "get" an "attractive" women?" The question can be answered simply, act fake. I am serious completely misrepresenting ones self is the way to the quick fix. It is rather unethical but look at the state of affairs or country and world is in so don't talk to me about ethics.

Now you are asking: "what does this have to do with Erin and his "pit of despair?" You are also probably saying "oo pits of despair sounds fun, is the water warm?" It has everything to do with me and quite abit to do with you too.

Throughout our lives, we are faced with not just problems that we must fix, but solutions as well. Through the finding out the solutions to our problems and then fixing we are somehow supposed to "learn" and add that to our stock pot of life knowledge, or some crap like that. I, on the other hand, think that it is all a load of new age hooey. In relating this to my situation, I have the perfect solution to my problem.

LEAVE

This seems like the best possible solution to the problem. I have no idea why it would not be beneficial; however, I would lose my 99 dollar initiation fee at HealthSport, that would piss me off. I might miss some people, though I can always foster new relationships with new people wherever I go; if I go. And you never know those new relationships could be far superior to those of this day in age. One never knows.

And where is the sex, in this post, you ask? Lost. It will be found in post, in a galaxy far far away in the not so distant future.

I probably had more to say, but I think I forgot it in between the afros and the bellbottoms. Oh one more thing on a positive note. We always try to end on a positive note. I am writing again. Not just blogs, but film scripts and poetry. This my friend is an excellent thing.

In closing, I love the name Amalia (pronounced aa-maa-lee-a). You will find it popping up in my scripts from now on, if you get to read them that is.

Brought to you by: Erin and The Committee to Promote Cynicism.

Anime Up Scotty, I'm Toxic.

2004-03-06T17:30:00.000-08:00

I saw Spirited Away earlier this morning and it was fucking awesome. Vivid and beautiful as anything I have ever seen. It was by Disney, unfortunately. I saw the English version and I thought that it might detract form the originality of the picture; however, the only thing that I did not like was the voice over for the main character, sen. I thought that the women who was the English voice was way to stereotypical. Whatever, it was still totally cool.

Ahh. I am addicted to Toxic. I don't know what is wrong with me. Well she does use The Electric Light Orchestra as background. Anyway I think the song is awesome. I hope I don't again become interested in sixteen year old girls as well. This type of interest happened to me a couple months ago and it was fun until the pain ensued. Stay away from the younger girls and focus on the chicks my own age that is what I have to remind myself. I say it to you all as well, "stick to the seven digit numbers your used to. Don't go making phony calls." That was a metaphor, for all you people who have no grasp of the english language.

As of this day I have continued the abolition of the role of casualism in my life. I am activley working to create the "connection." It seems to be going well albeit it slowly; however, as of "Once you Go Black You Never Go Back" I have made large steps, maybe evens leaps or bounds. I am moving toward the goal baby. You know I am going to score so bend over.........

Spring is coming and as some of you may or may not know, once again I am in search of those seven perfect sets of clothing for every day of the week. If any of you people out there, those of you with a lack of style need not apply, come accross a sale or a pair of pants or a shirt or whatever that you think would be "perfect" for me please inform me of the item as soon as you find it.

Brought to you by: Erin and The Committee in Support of The Militant Wing of The Salvation Army.

Meet My Meter

2004-03-06T16:34:00.000-08:00

No, not my "magic stick." My new site meter, check it out at the bottom of the page and see who has been skulking around my beautiful paradise. In similar updates to my blog layout: I should have some new links and maybe some more nifty features as soon as the monkey in my bathroom finishes coding them. Code monkey code.

Okay, now lets speak about my figurative "magic stick." I have been kicking ass at HealthSport and in three months I will be tearing them up. I am quickly increasing my weights and I am feeling awesome. It is great I even got hit on by a trainer and I am not even huge, muscle wise. I wasn't expecting getting hit on by hot trainer chicks until I was larger; you know because I thought they liked all huge Vin Diesel types, they are personal trainers you know.

Brought to you by: Erin and The Committee to Regulate Oral Sex. In our favor guys.

What A Waste of Fucking Paper

2004-03-06T03:41:00.000-08:00

It seems that people waste so much fucking paper. In a certain library that will remain nameless; I have found that there are five-hundred books of varying topics of stupidity. "The Opposing Viewpoints Series." I don't understand how they can waste so much fucking paper on such bullshit: mostly mundane topics.

furthermore, who designated these writers as authorities on these respective subjects.

What surprises me is that anybody cares about this bunch of malarky. Five-hundred books, this is where you tax dollars are going people. If you don't pay taxes congratulations, you have effectively pawned your responsibility off on other people and made them pay for this crap. More power to you.

Now if they had more books on the subject of fucking that would be fun; however they are stupid and would think that is not appropriate for the masses. FUCK THE MASSES.

Brought to you by: Erin and The Committee to Shave the Whales.

Once You Go Black You Never Go Back

2004-03-04T16:51:00.000-08:00

Now isn't that the truth. I have always thought that black chicks (African-American women, for all you politically correct people out there) are totally hot. However, now I think that they are even hotter; is that possible? Yes it is. Also, I think I have always liked/thought Hispanic chicks were kinda hot, maybe it's that "oh papi" thing they got going on. Actually, it is probably that and their really nice looking asses.

I digress, We are here to talk about black chicks. They are really hot. They have beautiful skin, awesome hair and most of them have perfect bodies, at least the ones that I look twice at. They are not hot just because of how they look either. (See I'm not shallow; in your face Fatass). I think that how they speak, act and their subtle intellect are some of their other main qualities. I scored some major points today in the reversing the "causalism" campaign (refer to last post for more information on "casualism." Of Course it all relates back to this posts title. So look for future posts about on the subject of the attractiveness of black chicks and my current situation with a certain one.

I was going to have a rant about something on here, but I wrote it down and now I don't have the paper with me. I will post it as soon as I have the time and the paper.

Brought to you by: Erin and The Committee To Make YOUR Penis Longer. Mine is quite long enough thanks.

[EDIT] THIS ( ! )

2004-03-03T22:26:00.000-08:00

Wow, am I editing this template or what *Gets Down with his bad self*. I have just come back from Health sport and let me tell you the hotties were out "enforce" tonight. But this is all boring to the loyal readers, as if I had any to begin with. Erin's (thats me for, all you stoners in the back row) new idealistic view is the abondonment of "casualism." Just to give a little background.

I have, in the past few months, been trying out what I now call "casualism," that is the act of treating everything casual. In this case, all we care about is the way in which interactions with the opposite sex are handled; fucking or otherwise (what did you think we were going to talk about , going steady, holding hands or getting pinned? Get Real Betty-Sue, we don't love you and we're not in the 1950s.) In laymens terms, all you psych majors can take five, we are talking about everything being casual from meetings (not called dates), to everything else you could ever imagine or want.

However, that was the old Erin, the Erin of last month. The new Erin has layed down an ultimatum: "If Ido not have any "connections" by the end of this semester I am out of this county." This means I have three months to find said "connections." Good luck to me.

In closing, wait is this a college paper?

In the upcoming issue of ME Magazine we will be sheding light on some of the debacles that have plequed my life (naughty place and otherwise), the proper way to eleviate menstral cramps, and why Donald Trump's hair looks like shit and the reason he still has a job.

Note:
To all you people who didn't get the title: (1) go take an anatomy class and (2) go hangout with some people who have dirty minds; I'm here all week in the Gold Rumpbuss Room.

Brought to you By: Erin & The Commitee to Legalize Public Female Bisexualism. Vote YES on Chicks Doing Chicks in the Streets (or Beds aslong as the beds are in the streets).

VAGINA, VAGINA, VAGINA!

2004-03-01T19:56:00.000-08:00

I have just procured my first and very own book of nudes. The book, titled Nudes: Indexxi, is awesome. It is my hope that soon I will have walls full of artistic nudes, but that is in the future. I would also like to relate that while I should be writing the speech paper thingimee-deal, I think I am addicted to Blogging.

I also got an urge to write about the fantastic Vagina Monologues, and Brooke of course. I went to The Vagina Monologues on February 9th, 2004; the opening night. It was absolutely amazing; I thought that it would be some sort of, I don't know, different. However, it was amazing, just breath taking. Brooke was beautiful as usual almost to the point of perfection and I felt that I was deeply connected to both her and the content of Eve Ensler's play. I can't believe that I haven't seen her in such a long time (2 weeks is long for me).

Fuck, I have to finish my paper thingee-deal and to get some sleep. I hear the Polls calling me. I have to spend from 6:00AM to 9:30PM there.

Chew on this Clunky

2004-03-01T18:10:00.000-08:00

First POST, First Post. Okay, I guess I am a geek; however I did get the first post at least on this bathroom wall of the Internet. Well I am at a loss for words. I finally found my friend Darrel's Blog; needless to say it was interesting. I was mentioned quite a few times. I feel my head swelling already (not that one you anaphylactic little mushroom). He has some interesting scrawlings on his little wall of the Internet, to say the least.

Wow, all I can say, on a completely different topic, is I miss Brooke. I don't know where she has disappeared to; I hope she isn't sick again. I haven't seen her in like two weeks and I am beginning to have that interesting outlook on life that one gets when they are away from their love..er...friend. [We try to stay away from words like that; they often fuck us over in the end.] But really now, you all know Brooke and if you don’t you should. She is awesome, Vegan just like me.

Still working on The Redwood-Times paper. I hope to have it out soon as soon as I can get a core group of people who are interested. This paper thing is taking up a lot of my time; if I am not able to find some other people who are interested i might have to reevaluate its effectiveness.

But now your asking "I thought this was about sex? or something that sounded like sex." It is and I will get to that hopefully in later posts, cranial power permitting. I will treat you to a twisted web of friend’s sisters and their crazy fathers, on second thought maybe not. Maybe I should tell you about missed opportunities…damn you father time (oh am I a patriarchal or what).